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The Reggie Rampage Memorial Awards

Because if the Leafs can win it, so can you!/Wiki Commons
Because if the Leafs can win it, so can you!/Wiki Commons

It’s time for the Carillon to give out its annual athletic awards

Each year, all of those tasked with calling themselves athletes for the University of Regina get together and hand each other self-congratulatory awards. In honour of the event, the Carillon presents their almost annual awards (The last sports editor decided they weren’t worth his time. His loss). Now, these used to be called “The Dickies,” in order to pay homage to the former Director of Athletics, but they have now been renamed to the Reggie Rampage Memorial Awards. Why the name? Largely because I hate both the mascots, not the people themselves, just the suits. I’m not a monster. We’ll begin with the most important award and move on from there.

The Vianne Timmons, All-Knowing Ruler of the Universe Award

Or, what you regular people call the President’s Award. The Cougars’ website lists the requirements and they seem rather stringent – we’ll leave it up to you as to whether you take that comment seriously.

“The President’s Award is presented to the student athlete who best represents the combination of above-average academic and athletic performance during his or her career at the University of Regina. A minimum cumulative GPA of 70 per cent, evidence of superior athletic achievement, and leadership are required criteria. The President’s Award is given to an athlete in their fourth or fifth year of eligibility. The athlete must have represented the U of R in competition in both the fall and winter semesters of the past season (with the exception of football and soccer).”

This one is actually pretty easy – cue the drum roll. And, the award goes to… Jonathan Tull of the men’s basketball team. Given that he is in grad school, we can safely assume that Mr. Tull is rocking an average above the 70 per cent threshold. According to the statistics available, Tull led the team in average minutes played, points per game, and steals. Other contenders included track and field’s Ahmed Alkabary and volleyball’s Jacques Borgeaud.

The Double X Award

According to the eminently reliable Cougars website, there is a slim list of requirements for the players of the year.

“The University of Regina Male [and female] Athlete of the Year is awarded to the student athlete with a minimum cumulative GPA of 60 per cent that best demonstrates outstanding athletic ability and leadership during the season. The athlete must have represented the U of R in competition in both the fall and winter semesters of the past season (with the exception of football).”

This particular award, then, is given to the female athlete of the year because why does every sports website list men’s sports first? Guess what, U of R? Your best teams (basketball, hockey, softball, cheerleading) are women’s sports, how about some equality? Also, it would include anyone who identifies as a woman who competes for the Cougars – yay, inclusion. I promise it’s only a joke name. With that said, this award goes to… Kylie Gavelin of the women’s hockey team. The fourth-year forward was a point-per-game scorer and played 26 of a possible 28 games

The XY Award

Given to the male athlete of the year, ditto for those identifying, this award is presented to… Noah Choboter of the Cougars swimming team. Become the second Cougar swimmer to ever win a CIS medal, and you win over the other people in the running. In case you’re wondering, the runner-up is Ahmed Alkabary.

The Diaper Dandy Awards

God bless the immortal Dick Vitale for inspiring the name for these awards, which congratulate the male and female rookies who made the most significant contributions during the season. On the men’s side, the winner is. On the women’s side, it was a close race between Hailey Wagar of women’s volleyball and Jaycee Magwood of women’s hockey. In the end, however, Magwood made the CIS All-Rookie Team, the Canada West Second Team All-Stars, Canada West All-Rookie Team, and was named Canada West Rookie of the Year, and so she gets the nod.

Team MUPs (Most Useful Players)

Basketball: Brian Ofori (M) and Sidney Dobner (W)

Track and Field: Ahmed Alkabary (M) and Reagan Fedak (W)

Volleyball: Brad Millers (M) and Tori Glynn (F)

Soccer: Tied between Kacey McFee and Savannah Williams

Wrestling: Gaelan Malloy (M) and Kayla Brodner and Kristine Longeau (F)

Hockey: Kylie Gavelin (F) and Mitch Kilgore (M)

Swimming: Eva Madar (F) and Noah Choboter (M)

Football: Riley Wilson

            What do the award winners receive, you ask? The Carillon’s undying love. The basketball teams will continue to be opined over for years to come – this is what happens when the sports editor and his boss are both hoop-heads – the volleyball teams will eventually find themselves a measure of credibility, (to their credit, their body language this year changed from being a bad impersonation of petulant seventh graders, and they were watchable for most of the year) and the football team will hopefully return to resembling a semi-competent squad in the upcoming year. This year saw some of the lesser-known sports – I’m looking at you swimming – make it to the forefront. I guess all of those press releases sent to my inbox finally paid off.

The main reason that McFee and Williams were soccer’s winners was that, when your team only wins one conference game, the goalies – or the ones that have to get hit with a ball repeatedly – deserve the recognition at the end of the year. Brian Ofori showed great energy for the ‘Cougs, and Dobner’s continual communication helped the women’s team succeed. Kilgore fought hard for the less than hard-hitting hockey squad, while Gavelin was the leader of a meaningful team. Alkabary, Fedak, Brodner, Malloy, and Longeau all put more medals into the U of R’s trophy case. Millers and Glynn represented well, as did Madar and Wilson. All in all, it was a good year on an individual basis for these particular Cougar athletes.

About John Loeppky

I am an athlete with a writing problem, or a writer with a sports problem, you decide. When I’m not editing, playing wheelchair sports, or advocating for the disabled, you can find me de-stressing with friends.