Football! Football! FOOTBALL!!
Authors: Kyle Leitch, Matt Wincherauk, John Loeppky, Michael Chmielewski, Harrison Brooks
- The Patriots are in the midst of a scandal, #DeflateGate, #Ballghazi, whatever you want to call it. Do you think this will have an effect on their play, and do you think they’ll be punished for their supposed transgressions?
Leitch: Not likely. Belichick and his Patriots seem to be the Golden Calf of the NFL. Some fines will be passed around, and we’ll all move on.
Wincherauk: This has, no joke, kept me up at night worrying. This is the stupidest scandal the NFL has had for a long time. What’s worse is it’s being treated more seriously than any of the domestic abuse scandals the NFL has had on it’s hands this season. But, “integrity of the game” right?
Chmielewski: I don’t really know if they will be punished, I’m really not sure. But, I know for sure that this stupid controversy will not affect their play: they’re professionals, and the best football team of the 21st century. Enough said.
Lang: They won’t be punished, but at the same time it’s getting a little ridiculous. We’re all tired of hearing bullshit from good teams. They’re doing anything to win, let’s give them that, I guess…
Brooks: Since Tom Brady proved he can play well with underinflated balls, the only way it will affect their play is if, to get back at them, someone overinflated the balls. Tom Brady wouldn’t complete a pass!
- Richard Sherman is arguably the most notorious trash talker in football, and maybe sports today. Numerous people on the football field want to shut him up, through “physical means.” If you could punch one athlete, who would it be?
Leitch: Consequence free? Chuck Liddell. If not, Pete Rose, but ONLY if he’s dressed like a giant chicken.
Wincherauk: I’d probably punch Bernard Pollard. He’s not an outright jackass, but he’s cost the Patriots Tom Brady, Rob Gronkowski, and the last person to tackle notorious murderer Aaron Hernandez before he was arrested for said murders. Coincidence? I think not…
Chmielewski: I would punch Muhammad Ali in the face. My answer is braver than all the other answers, because he’s a pretty fearsome boxer I hear. He was heavyweight champion for a while, don’t you know.
Lang: I always get this question, I’ve gone with A-Rod and Sean Avery, but this time in terms of the “Terrible Three” I’ll go with Kobe Bryant. I’ve always hated the guy, I’m not sure if it’s his demeanor or just how much of an asshole the guy is. I hate Kobe Bryant.
Brooks: I would punch Jon Ryan, just because I’m peanut butter and jealous how much everybody likes him. Also, I think I can take a punter.
- This matchup has Tom Brady play Russell Wilson, the spitting image as a quarterback of Brady when he was in his early days. Who will go down with more Super Bowls, Brady or Wilson?
Leitch: Russell Wilson, simply because I feel like this will be the unpopular answer.
Wincherauk: I’m incredibly biased, so I’ll go with Tom Brady. I’m not even sure that the Patriots of the early 2000s were as stacked as these Seahawks. But Wilson is very close in my honest opinion.
Chmielewski: Easy, Brady. He’s a once in a lifetime quarterback for a once in a lifetime team.
Lang: Tom Brady, without question. Better era, easier for Brady to be that dominant.
Brooks: Spitting image as a quarterback? Has Tom Brady ever even ran the ball before? If Wilson wins this one he will end his career with more Superbowls, but if not then he won’t.
- Jon Ryan is playing in his second Super Bowl with a chance to add to his collection. Who’s the greatest Canadian born football player of all time, CFL or NFL?
Leitch: OJ Santiago. Who doesn’t love The Dirty Bird?
Wincherauk: Ron Lancaster. The Little General. I think all Riders fans love the man, and I’m sure there’s a more “right” answer, but I don’t care. My love for Lancaster overrides sensibility.
Chmielewski: I’ll go with Jon Ryan. Hometown hero!
Lang: A guy that comes to mind is definitely Jon Cornish. He’s so dominant. It’s incredible how dominant he is in this era of football. Please don’t kill me Rider Nation.
Brooks: Rueben Mayes for two reasons. 1. Because he went to high school with my dad. 2. He was the first name on the list when I Googled the question.
- Last question… Who ya got? Give the score and the MVP of the game.
Leitch: As much as I don’t like the Patriots, I don’t like the Seahawks more. 34 – 31 Pats, with Brady as MVP.
Wincherauk: Uhh… Umm… I guess I’ll say Seahawks 31-27, only because I’m an impartial journalist, with Marshawn Lynch as the MVP.
Chmielewski: I’ll go 35-32, for the Patriots. Brady wins MVP after an awesome comeback drive. Then, he should retire that night. Perfect ending to an amazing career.
Lang: Pats by 10, Gronk as the MVP.
Brooks: Seahawks! MVP? Richard Sherman because he’s the best corner in the game, so when the Patriots try him with a sorry receiver like Edelman, thats the result you gon’ get!